Midlife Crisis

I am having a slight melt down as I lay here on my bed thinking about my upcoming birthday in less than two weeks time. I am greatly cheered by the fact that I am friends with so many ardent spankophiles and will in all likelihood get spanked soundly for the week leading to my birthday and hopefully for at least the week after.

I  think I am having a minor midlife crisis... what is it about turning 45 that is making me feel like this. Overnight I am wondering if I am to old to be behaving like this and to be plastering my soundly spanked bottom all over my blog? Should I be behaving with more decorum as becomes a woman of my age?

Will I ever get enough of being spanked? Am I to live with this continual craving for more... terrified of what I earn for myself regularly yet always seeking more and behaving badly, breaking the rules, not achieving my weight loss goals, making silly sports bets... all so I can receive my regular punishment... and what if my bottom starts to wrinkle? Will I be so eager to have it so boldly on display ?

What is the solution to this madness ? I know my standard reply ....... GO forth and earn a great good spanking... maybe it will force me to focus on my tender bottom instead of these ridiculous bouts of panic and self doubt....

Monday Blues

I have had such a crazy week and a busy weekend work wise and even though I have tried really hard to eat only what I should,I have had a couple of drinks and am quiet sure that I have not lost enough weight this past week and the clock is ticking towards the date I need to have lost 5 kilograms or face 45 strokes from HH and on top of that a caning /spanking of undetermined strokes from sluttyboi... I am petrified of what will happen and have been having flashes of what my bottom is going to look like and the rest of me...

My bottom blue...

I am feeling more than a little blue knowing that my bottom and other bits are going to be blue ....that is a blue little bottom after 6 or so...

What happens after 45 ? We know what happens after 28....

so I may just feel blue emotionally at this time, but I am getting the distinct feeling that I am going to literally be blue as well.... I really need to get more exercise and not drink....

Pretty picture

Apologies for lack of narrative today ! Long day at office , just home ! Photograph will hopefully suffice! They do say a picture speaks a 1000 words... enjoy!

sluttySir continued....

Where was I in the telling of my tale? Torquemada had just offered my up for torture and penance on the Sunday morning and flogged my back and rubbed it with a Tabasco rub... sluttySir had stuck a big red cross on my back with duct tape and laid me out like an altar, flowers in between my ass cheeks, candles lit ( pooling wax )along my back asking me if I knew anal sex was a sin !

Altar !

My sins needed to be beaten out of me and that I needed to be tortured till I confessed. As I lay there he started beating me with the strap all over. With hard blows of the strap on my thighs,legs , bottom and feet! Oi how the bastinado hurt... and all while I had to lie still as I had a series of candles lit balanced on my back! I could not help but wriggle as my feet were being spanked. Earning me the wrath of sluttySir and more spanking.

Very strapped legs !

Once satisfied that my legs and feet had been seen to and that I was getting closer to breaking down and confessing my sins .... the candles came into play and Sir dropped hot wax all over my tender burny Tabasco rubbed back! This just reignited the burn from the Tabasco and sealed the burn into my skin some more!

At this stage , I just gave in ! I was still belligerent... and am sure if Sir had continued I would have confessed to just about anything !

Flogged, brushed, strapped and waxed....with flowers left out on display

For a first session of submission it had been enough and it was time for our breakfast at the guest house! I was released, my back scraped clean and left to tidy the mess before breakfast.

I look forward to my next session as sluttymiss for sluttySir a worthy man to submit to with and incredibly evil mind! One that without a doubt will create a m,ore intense experience next time.... very soon I am sure.

Tender tender bits..gently resting my zebra bottom!

I have to report back that I still have each and every line on my bottom! Which surprised both HH and myself as usually by the next morning after a caning I have not a single mark to show!

As meek as a little lamb , resting my strpey bottom on a soft pillow!

I am sitting very carefully today and am so thrilled that the massage session we are receiving at the office today is not a full body one and only a neck and shoulder as I would be hard pressed to explain to a therapist at work what the lines on my bottom were as they are unmistakeably cane marks!

Sitting on an extra soft pillow with great care! I have no idea what HH did last nite but it certainly was a punishment session and a half... and I will be feeling it for a day or two at least!

Punishment tonight ....

One would think after my session this evening that I had learnt my lesson? I certainly felt every stroke and will be feeling some of them for days yet... HH certainly spanked and caned my bottom well... yet as we sat chatting afterwards and I was asked if I was betting on the weekend game between Australia and South Africa, instead of declining I heard myself say " Yes Sure , Why not..." silly girl and this combined with the threat of 45 if I do not lose the required number of kilograms this month... I should have my head read....I am certifiably mad , of that I am convinced!

All warmed up and ready to start!

SO we started with a light spanking with the tawse to warm up my bottom , one after the other HH softly spanked my bottom with the tawse interjecting with a harder swat or two , just to ensure that I do not fall asleep or drift off, keeping my mind focused on the job at hand and of the punishment that was to come!

10 down 18 to go! all evenly spaced!

We had agreed that we would do it sets 1 of four strokes and then four sets of 6 each!  The warm up was fine and the first four were all okay... but as HH started going lower down ( as he was laying down evenly spaced straight lines all over my bottom) it started to burn, those sensitive areas that under normal circumstances do not get much attention from the cane!

Close up after 16 strokes of the erringly accurate cane!

After each set of 6 a picture would be taken and the burn rubbed into me and welts rubbed , as soothing as that is it also brings its own unique pain... and of course standing on display having your bottom photographed shames a girl in ways that cannot be explained!

All done... out on display waiting for it to settle!

driving to my demise....

It is getting terrible now.... I am having a mild implosion... 40 or so minutes before I have to get into my car and start the long 1 and half to two hours in peak hour traffic to ensure that I am not late for my punishment session as tardiness is sure to be rewarded with additional strokes....my heart is beating fast and I am all agitated.... I am afraid and yet perversely excited as being punished is a thrill and I like the pain... it excites me oh so much....